Tell Me Who (or What) Do You Love?

I’m reading a really engaging book right now…one that’s been on my shelf for quite a while that I’ve avoided reading because I know of the conviction I’ll feel within upon reading it…
I’m going to attempt to blog a bit as I journey through this text, which is challenging who I am as a worship leader, a worshipper, and even a lover of things and people…(more to come on that last one).  There are times when, as a worshipper and as a worship leader, its hard to lead people to a place of deep, cleansing, refreshing, living water, when your own heart is desperately dry.  And it doesn’t get any easier the more you do it.  I’ve lead worship every Sunday (with few exceptions) since early 2001.  And the time has come for some heart-treatment.  Maybe, just maybe, this blog will be an outlet for me…

First thing that struck me in today’s reading was a very simple quote… “We can’t love anything in the right way unless we love God more.”
Took me a while to pick myself up and go on after reading that…

Finally for today, a quote from Isaac Watts, as quoted by Charles Spurgeon…

“The Great God values not the service of me, if the heart not be in it: The Lord sees and judges the heart; he has no regard to outward forms of worship, if there be no inward adoration, if no devout affection be employed therein.  It is therefore a matter of infinite importance, to have the whole heart engaged steadfastly for God.”

So, tell me…who (or what) do you love?

2 thoughts on “Tell Me Who (or What) Do You Love?

  1. When I led singing for a period of time, I likewise found it difficult for my heart, mind, and soul to receive a spiritual annointing. The “mechanics” of leading others in worship robbed my worship relationship. I prayed for God to show me how to balance the mechanics and personal worship. He provided me a connection with the faces and actions of my brothers and sisters who were actively engaged in worship to God. I remember one Sunday when the Spirit became the rain in a parched desert of my heart. I remember looking upward, and in my mindseye, I could see Jesus seated at the right-hand of God and all of Heaven was singing along with us. What a connection with the Heavenly realm. I was convinced that my worship “roots” were pretty shallow. So I want to seek God, I want Him to open my eyes, and I want to keep knocking so He will open the door.

  2. I understand the situation you are describing. After leading practically every Sunday from 1976 – 2005, I reached a crossroads. Fighting through the fatigue does no good. Being a lawyer by trade, I figured that I should rededicate my efforts and things would come into focus. You can overcome anything by hard work… right??? I was wrong, and burnout and “life” take their toll.

    Although it doesn’t directly answer your question of what or who do you love, one thing became clear–others can minister to me. Letting others do the ministering and being the recipient is a simple thing, but yet so hard for a person who tends to be driven. Being a “regular member” of the body can bring refreshing and a new outlook on your own ministry.

    A second path out of the desert is exercising Christian disciplines. At our congregation, we are beginning a study of Christian disciplines. I believe that I am going to love the tools that we are exploring.

    Third, I think worship is a way out of a time of spiritual stagnation, even for a worship leader. Being a staff worship minister, you don’t have the luxury of saying– I’m taking the next ____ months off (And maybe you should have that luxury!). For me, the worship described in this paragraph takes two forms: 1) Going to assemblies that I am not personally involved in directing; and 2) private worship time at home.

    Letting someone else lead takes you out of the ruts and old habits and transports you to a different and better place in worship. Private worship likewise puts you into a different frame of mind and spirit. It is a complete joy to sit at a piano and sing and play songs that bring me to the heart of God…Then I listen and sing along with new music and recordings. This has to be done without a thought of “we can use that at church and I can arrange it.” This worship is for you and God, and not with an eye towards how it can be used in ministry.

    In this discussion, I’ve come to describe what I love– The times of private worship without the pressures and restraints of producing a product, and times of worship where I am just another worshiper. It allows me to experience the grace provided by God, and remember only He is all sufficient.

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